I think the last thing I wrote on here about my health was the whole "brain" thing. It's so weird to say that. A recent scan I had said that it had grown slightly larger (but that can be normal, especially after the gamma knife procedure). As far as the rest of my body goes, I was having some pain around my tail-bone area and we had a bone scan to rule out anything. We found out yesterday that it is just arthritis on my lower spine. It was good news (it's not cancer), and it helps to explain why I was having pain there. Thanks for continuing to lift me up in prayer. It is very humbling to know that there are people that read this and who are praying.

Hope you have a great weekend!

:)
sarah

It never ceases to amaze me how God is always at work. He never stops. Ever. I take a look at the past 4 years and start reflecting on the things I have talked about in the past two entries. Stepping out in faith can be one of the scariest things you may ever do and maybe even the hardest. Circumstances are different for everyone. Some may immediately be surrounded by other Christians who can spur them on. Others may not have a single person around them that can relate to their relationship with Christ. If you are in a place where you are surrounded with other’s whose faith is the same as you, it can be very encouraging and the Christian walk can seem easy. If you are in a situation where there are few people and maybe even no one around you that can share your faith, it can be discouraging and sometimes frustrating. Taking a leap of faith and believing in something that you can’t see is both freeing and overwhelming. On one hand you are experiencing a freedom like no other. There is a weight lifted because you have no doubt that you always have a Father in heaven who is walking every single step of your life with you. You are assured of your placed in heaven when your time on earth is finished. On the other hand, there will be times when you might feel like an “alien” at either school, workplace or even your home. You may feel lonely at times. You may feel like no one understands you and why you are living out your life in a way that may seem weird to everyone else. It may seem easier just to conform to what the world says is “normal”, especially when fear grips us at our moment of decision.

So, when we step out in faith and believe in Christ, how do we continue if we seem bombarded by the things of the world? First, let me say that I am in no way an expert. I am only 28 years old and have much to learn. I don't really have all the answers. I know it's extremely hard sometimes to be bold and turn away from the patterns we have become accustomed too. Start with this verse:

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." -Romans 12:2


How do we do that? These verses below are a great way to start.

“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these.”
-Mark 12: 29-31


This is obviously important because Jesus himself spoke these words. How do we love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength? We must make Jesus Christ the absolute Lord our lives. In order for this relationship to be personal, it has to be more than Sunday morning church. Is God intertwined in everything else we do Monday through Saturday? Are we reading the Bible everyday and applying it to our lives (James 1:22)?


“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. You see, at just the right time when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” -Romans 5:1-8

The second part of the greatest commandment says to love your neighbor as yourself. Since we are not face to face, I don’t know your personal story. For some, this may be easy to do, for others it may be more difficult. Loving those around you might start off easy and then you may go through different periods in your life when it is more difficult. I was reminded recently of the great example of Jesus who ate the last supper with Judas, knowing he was going to betray him and still loved him. After toiling with that reminder, the verse above came to me. If that isn’t the ultimate example of love, then I don’t know what is.

I’ll close this entry out with this verse:

“For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. So do not be ashamed of me or his prisoner. But join with me in suffering for the gospel, but the power of God, who has saved us and called us to a holy life-- not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. - 2 Timothy 1:7-9

Time passes by sooooooooo fast!! It has been a month since I have wrote last. Just a little tidbit, I am writing this entry for the second time. I had everything written out and went to save, but my time had expired and I lost everything...a little frustrating, but oh well.

Basically what I tried to post on here was an expansion of what I wrote about in the last entry...faith. Moving here to WV has been a step of faith. Although it has been great to be home with family and friends, it has also been very trying. In D.C. I was given the opportunity to work with an amazing ministry, ministering to kids. I was allowed to work alongside some GREAT people and I was able to develop relationships with friends that will last a lifetime. My relationship with God also grew and deepened. I knew that things would be different moving back here than when I lived here before, I just didn't know how everything was going to pan out.

For the past six months, I have kind of been laying low....(at least it seems that way since I have been in the front-lines for so long). This was hard for me. I couldn't tangibly see how God was using me. Looking back, I clearly see my purpose was not to be in the "front-lines", but to be in the background, learning and growing my relationship with Christ. Six months later, God is starting to open some doors here (at least that I can see). In a couple of weeks, I, along with a friend are going to start leading the middle/high school girls at our church. This is really exciting because these girls have been on my heart for over a year now. I remember talking to my uncle a year and a half ago about how God had laid these girls on my heart. I didn't understand it because I was very content and happy with where I was serving in D.C.

I encourage you, wherever you are, to hold on and keep pressing forward. You may not understand the circumstances of life or why you are in the place you are in, but God does and He will show you where to go, if you allow Him to work. Give Him your everything....let go of the things that are bogging you down and keeping you from a relationship with Him. Listen, we only have one life here on earth. We are given the choice to believe or not to believe.

I put a song on my myspace page by 33 Mile called "Hold On". If you get a chance, you can click over there on the right hand side and it will take you directly to my page. It's a great song...I love the lyrics.

Hold on my friends and have faith...God will lead you, if you let go and give Him your all.

:)
sarah

Have you ever felt like you were walking into the next phase of your life blindfolded, not knowing what lies ahead, but knowing that God has a plan? "Faith" is one of those words that is heard and spoken about quite frequently in Christianity. What is faith? Before I attempt to answer that question, I must admit that I have hesitated to write on here because I see that there are a number of people who read my entries. I am thankful that I have this platform to share my story with others out there, but very aware that it is only because of God that this website exists. Therefore, I have been convicted to use this website to not only share my story, but to use this as a tool to minister to anyone out there who feels "empty" or "lost".

I remember very vividly when I was the After School Coordinator for DayBreak Ministries when I often felt and even expressed outloud that I did not feel adequate to do the job. Looking back I see that it was in my weakness that God was revealed. Even though I felt inadequate, I was confident that God had placed me specifically at DayBreak to work with the kids in Lincoln Heights. I say all of that because here I am in WV, feeling inadequate again. It seems that God is calling me to use my time here at home to write....I am not a writer, hence the feelings of inadequacy.

So, what is faith? Faith is believing in the unknown, trusting in what you can't see. Hebrews 11:6 says "Without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." To put it simply: Faith pleases God.

Some of you reading this might not have a relationship with God at all. Some of you may have heard of God and acknowledge that He exists, but haven't made the relationship personal. Some of you may have accepted Jesus, but have not made the relationship personal. Some of you may be walking with Jesus and living your life for Him. All circumstances require fatih. If you don't know who God is, I encourage you to take a step of faith and start seeking Him. You might be reading this and have been experiencing inner turmoil, or have been having this tug at your heart that something is missing. I beg you to take a step of faith and pray...asking God to reveal to you who He is and why you were created. I can promise you that if you seek Him with all your heart He will reveal Himself!

Let me first thank all of you for your prayers!! My recovery has been slow, but very good. Each day I try to do a little more to build up my strength. The other day, I went on a walk, which was exciting. This past month has been a lot of fun, too. Both of my brothers had birthdays and my friend Julia came for a visit. My brother Jeremy plays basketball for WV State, so I have been going to his games. They are in tournament play and have a game tonight, so I'm looking forward to that. My youngest brother Jason left yesterday for the National Guard. It will be weird for him to be gone for so long, but it is an experience he is excited about and one that I'm sure will be beneficial for him.

I had a scan this past week and things are stable!! It's great news because I can continue to stay off of chemo. It's such a praise! I have been extremely overwhelmed lately at God's grace and provision for this time in my life. Being an employee of Mclean Bible Church has showed me first hand how they choose to take care of someone in the body of Christ. They have been so supportive and are in favor of me being at home with my family which relieves a lot of burdens. Everytime I think about what they have done for me, I am so overwhelmed.

You might remember me telling you about a friend of mine last fall whose husband was killed in a car accident. She was pregnant at the time of the accident. Last Friday, Bethany gave birth to a 10 pound baby girl named Caroline Joy Elswick. She is awesome!!!! Both mom and baby are doing well. Bethany is living at home with her parents here in Barboursville. Please continue to keep Bethany and Caroline in your prayers.

:)
Sarah