I had a scan last Friday of my brain. Just a quick recap of the brain situation. My first brain met was treated at UK with the Gamma Knife. When it grew we took it out surgically. We did follow up scans and it was back again, so we went to New York to see what we could do. We did whole brain radiation. A couple of months later we did a follow up scan and there was a new place. So, we did the Cyber Knife, which takes us to where we are now. I had a brain follow up scan from the Cyber Knife last Friday. We got the results back on Monday and there is a new place. THANKFULLY, it was a new place. Any new place we can treat, but if it has already been treated, then we don't have many other options. So, even though it stinks that there is another one up there, at least it is new and we can Cyber it!

Hope you all have a great day..

:)
sarah

I think I have come to a huge milestone in my life. Through prayer, scripture and encouragement from my family in Christ, I am experiencing true joy and peace. I've always struggled with how we can have joy when it seems like the valley is never ending. Having joy for me doesn't mean I'm always walking around smiling and laughing. This joy I speak of is an inner-peace that is almost indescribable. It is knowing that my life is completely surrendered to my Lord. It is knowing that even when I'm having a horrible day (physically, emotionally, etc), that I have a God who is greater than anything this world has to offer. It is knowing that my flesh and heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever (Palsm 73:25-26). It is knowing that my identity is in Christ and of nothing of this world.

If you aren't a Christian or don't know Christ (and maybe some of you that are Christians), what I said above my sound weird and strange. I want to encourage all of you that are Christians to really live it out. Stand up and be firm for ways of God. God will reward you one day for your obedience and loyalty to Him. Love like the Lord has commanded us to do. Love Him first above everyone and love all those the Lord has placed in your life. Stay connected to the vine (Jesus) so that you will bear fruit (fruits of the Spirit...love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness and self-control). There is no better witness for the Lord than living a quiet life that is becoming more and more like Him everyday.

Maybe you are reading this and don't know Christ. Maybe you are a Christian, but have been out of the loop lately (not going to church, etc). Maybe you feel that you are in pit and you want to get out but you don't know how. Maybe you are habitually sinning (repeating the same sin) and want to change, but you feel stuck or like there's no way out. If there is one thing I have learned and experienced over the past few years is God's grace. There is absolutely nothing that God won't forgive. His grace is sufficient for each one of us, no matter what we have done in the past. I beg you not to let guilt of a past sin or maybe a current sin stop you from coming to Jesus for forgiveness. He forgives....as far as the east is from the west.

As human beings we have a sinful nature, that is why when the fall happened in Genesis, there had to be a bridge that would bring us back in standing with God and that bridge is God's son Jesus. As Christians, this is a fundamental truth...we believe Christ was crucified, died and rose on the third day and is now in heaven at the right hand of God.

I ask God regulary to burden my heart with what burdens Him. Listen, He wants nothing more than to be in a relationship with us. That is why we were created...to be in a relationship with Him. He wants all souls of men to belong to Him, but He has given us free choice. We can choose to bow down to Him or we can choose to deny God.

I believe with everything I am.....down to the very core of me that Jesus is the Messiah. There is a God. I pray that the Holy Spirit is working through you right now as you read this. If you haven't given your life to Christ and want to, it's simple....just ask Him...pray and repent of your sins and then give Him your life as a living sacrifice. Live your life for Him and Him alone.

A couple more things...I had a scan of my body last week and everything is stable!! I have a scan in a couple of weeks for my brain and am praying that will be stable as well. My brother Jeremy has bought a house and I'm moving in with him. We are looking forward to being roomies again!

I hope all of you had a blessed weekend! May the grace of God be with you this coming week. Christians....let your light shine! Love, love, love and stand firm for what you believe and know is the truth in Christ Jesus.

love your guts :)
sarah

The last three days I've been treated with the Cyber Knife. It sounds scary, but it's not bad. The worst part is getting fitted for your face mask and then having to wear it. It's very constricting and tight. They did cut out the nose so i could breathe better. I brought in a mixed CD that I have and they played it for me while I was getting treated. So, other than sleeping a lot and some headaches here and there, physically I'm doing pretty good.

Jeremy and I took the girls back to DC this past weekend. We spent the rest of the time with friends (when I wasn't sleeping...haha), which was really fun. I got a call from Julia (my boss at DayBreak) and she got engaged last night! SO exciting for her!!!

I'm going to make this short so I can upload some recent pics. Take care and I'll talk to you soon...

sarah

It's almost been 2 weeks that Tonisha and Tamia have been here visiting. It's been really good. I'm so excited that Tonisha and Tamia have been able to spend this time together. I tell you what though...having kids is HARD WORK! It takes so much energy. I love children and being around them...there's nothing like the spirit of a child, but I know one thing (at least at this point in my life) I do not have the energy to have kids. I'm not married, so that's not even an issue. Maybe by the time I get married (if it's God's will for my life) they'll have an energy pill or something....haha.

My brother Jeremy is going with me this weekend to take the girls back to DC. Actually, he'll be doing all the driving, which I am thankful for. He might be buying a house and I might live with him for a while, which would be awesome because it is just a block away from Julie and Hutch's.

We went to the amish country this past weekend (me, mom, dad, jeremy, tonisha and tamia). it was fun. i love the amish country....it is so peaceful. I think the girls had a good time, too.

Oh, and the Olympics started last Friday...can't get any better than that, plus football season is just around the corner. My favorite season is the fall and we're almost there!

A little update on my health. I've had a couple of scans lately. One on my back (I've been having pain in my lower back) and a brain MRI (a follow up). The results for the back were good...no cancer there, but I do have a bulging disc that is probably caused from degeneration of my bones (from the steriods). The results for the brain were a mixed bag. One place has shrunk a little, the other stayed the same. The bad news is that there is a new lesion. Everything has moved very fast. I just found out yesterday and I went to the hospital yesterday afternoon to get fitted for my mask. I go tomorrow for a CT and MRI of my brain (they use these to map out the treatment). I'm going to do Cyber Knife at St. Mary's.

Some of you may be asking why does this keep happening to her. Well, I've got an answer. I'm doing a life journal with our youth group and I have really been blessed by it. It's cool because they give you a set of scriptures or a chapter to read for the day, but you choose the scripture that speaks to you and you journal about that particular scripture. The other day, John 9 was part of our reading. Let me write what it says for you. This chapter is about Jesus healing a blind man.

"As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind? Jesus answered, Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life."

You know, this hasn't been the easiest walk of life, but it's the only one I want...one that is completely sacrficed for the will of the Lord Jesus Christ.

Thank you for all your prayers and kindness towards me and my family. May God bless you for your graciousness.

love your guts :)
sarah

Katye, one of the girls in our small group up here in DC is getting married Saturday. Julie, Gracie and I drove up Wednesday. Wednesday night we spent the evening with Heather and Jerry (who we are staying with), Traci and Ali. We had a really good time, sharing stories and lots of laughter. Yesterday, I stayed here and rested while Julie and Gracie went to lunch with some people that Julie used to work with. Last night we went to Katye's bridal shower, which was really fun. Right now, Julie and Gracie are taking naps. When they get up, we're meeting a friend for lunch and then heading down to Lincoln Heights (DayBreak). I am so excited I can hardly stand it! I can't wait to see the kids and parents! Hopefully later we'll meet up with Jared and Mike for dinner (some really good friends of ours). Tomorrow morning is the wedding and then we're going to pick up Tonisha and Tamia (my mentee and her little sister). They are coming back with me for 2 weeks to visit! I'm sooooooooooooo excited about that.

That's all for now...Hope you all have a great weekend!

:)
sarah